Reader, I created something awhile ago, and it's on my heart to share it with you today.
As you may know, creating etheric spaces and environments is part of my practice. I don't know if it stems from being a Landscape Architect and my skill of crafting spaces, or if Landscape Architecture was a way that I felt this spiritual tug and accessed it the only way that made sense before I opened to my gifts. But no matter which came first, the chicken or the egg, it's a big part of how I live in both the seen and unseen worlds.
I have a room where I tend to each of the decks I've created/am creating. I have a space where I gather with my council of ancestors and elders. The Mythosomatic Sanctuary is an entire world that I share with the folks in that program.
And now, there's a peace room.
In general, I'm an incredibly hope-oriented person. Not necessarily an "always a silver lining" kind of person, but a "what can I do, in this moment, to orient towards a world that centers, protects, and cares for those who need it most."
Living in this world, at this moment in time, it's been harder for me to keep that orientation. It's felt so fragmented because there are so many needs to be met. So many actions to take. So much information. It's easy for hopelessness to take hold.
So, I've prioritized a few things in my life to ensure I stay out of collapse and am resourced and resilient enough to stay aware and remain in action:
- I feel my freaking feelings. When they arise, when they're present, I feel them.
This ensures that I'm not shoving them down into a mass of unexpressed energy that will collapse into hopelessness, depression, anxiety, or, often in my case, a migraine. Feeling my feelings is also a daily practice in nervous system regulation, resilience, and discomfort tolerance. A regulated nervous system is one that can move through these states and come back.
2. I created a peace room.
The peace room arose in a moment of desperation. I felt like I was spinning wildly in my living room, clutching my hair, looking for any crumb of direction. I could hear the refrain, "What do I do, what do I do, what do I do?" in time with the sawing in and out of my breath. In that moment, I saw it.
This etheric space (which I won't describe to maintain its anonymity) emerged fully formed in front of my eyes. I could see it, spin it around, and understand what it was.
I started building immediately.
I created this space with two intentions: one, hold whatever it was I brought to the space, and transmute it with acceptance and love; and two, tell me one action I could take in alignment with the goal of peace on Earth in every timeline (a refrain that has been drumming through my head for years.)
Now, this room is heavily guarded. If my intentions aren't pure and in alignment with peace on Earth, it won't let me in. If I arrive on its doorstep and it pushes me back, I have to investigate why.
Am I arriving with feelings of revenge or retribution? Ok, I need to go feel the feelings underneath of that and then come back.
Is there an energy of manipulation within me? Time to look at what I want to control with a particular action or outcome.
This room keeps me honest. It keeps me aligned. And it keeps me out of collapse.
As I write this email, I'm reminded of what I've learned in many trauma trainings. Trauma, in the body, isn't about the event or events, it's about how you processed or didn't process what happened. So maybe in writing this to you today I'm simply sending a gentle reminder to process. However that looks for you, with whatever tools and resources and support you have.
Or maybe this email is a nudge to get creative and think outside of the box. My peace room surely isn't a typical response or creation, but it works for me. What might work for you?
If you're in collapse, if all of this feels like too much of a stretch or inaccessible, I'm here, doing the work of supporting your body, your lineage, your energy, and your emotions. I'd be happy to work together.
In support of your soma,
Ash